She said, "One of the reasons why ladies keep on saying that Chivalry is dead. Unattractive na nga di pa gentleman. Sorry but I'm just being honest. At hindi ako grabe. I don't mean to offend anyone of you boys, I have friends na gentleman. This is just my opinion, respect it. Mind your own business." ("One of the reasons why ladies keep on saying that Chivalry is dead. [This guy] is unattractive and worse, not a gentleman. Sorry but I'm just being honest. And I'm not exaggerating. I don't mean to offend anyone of you boys [because] I have friends who are [gentlemen.] This is just my opinion, respect it. Mind your own business.")
I chose to simply share the post on my wall and ignore the girl's claim that "chivalry is dead". Besides, "Should a guy offer his seat to a girl?" remains one of the most argued (and brought up) propositions about gender equality. At some point, one just gets tired of answering "yes" or "no" while the truth is "it depends on the situation".
I also did not contribute to the discussion because I thought that the guy defended himself well when he saw his photo online. He said, "Wag lang magpakita 'tong Paola Kristal Shane Gardon na 'to sakin a. Hindi na nga attractive, ang taba pa ng utak. May pwesto naman na puro babae lang e bat nakikipagsiksikan ka para sa lahat? Aba hindi lang ikaw ang pagod na kelangan umupo!" ("I wish my path wouldn't cross with Paola Kristal Shane Gardon, an unattractive and ill-informed [woman.] There are available [seats] in the girl's [trains], why did you get inside the shared genders' trains? You are not the only tired [commuter] who wants to have a seat!")
Until...a friend from the ministry commented on my post. She said, "Gusto ko magcomment pero wag na lang. Hahaha! Anong opinion mo, Ross?" (I would have wanted to comment but I would rather not do so. What do you think, Ross?)
This made me rethink the situation, put my self in the guy's position, and write what I've always wanted to. I said, "I don't think women should feel automatically entitled to have a seat inside the men's (or shared genders') designated trains unless they are old, pregnant, disabled, with a child or someone who physically carries a heavy load.
As a society, we have high respect for women (especially compared with other countries) but this does not give women the right to embarrass men if they didn't get what they think is rightfully theirs - well in fact, they are inside our (or the shared genders') assigned trains.
Besides, people, like this guy, get tired and gender has nothing to do with it. At the end of the day we all just want to feel comfortable when commuting. If the girl really thinks she can get that feeling from our public transport system, she should've reached the station earlier - or just hired a cab."
I honestly felt relieved to share my thoughts on this sensitive issue (Yes, any issue where gender equality, or the lack of it, is involved, is sensitive).
I also want to tell the lady who posted in Facebook that the worse thing that can ever happen to chivalry being dead is feminism stepping back a million miles because of overly self-righteous and entitled girls. Like her.
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