In my previous entries, I normally express what connections I feel in the book and the reasons why I like it. This time though, I will be answering eleven “Questions for Discussions” included in The Secret Life of Bees.
1. Were you surprised to learn that T. Ray used to be different, that he once truly loved Deborah? How do you think Deborah’s leaving affected him? Did it shed any light on why T. Ray was so cruel and abusive to Lily?
I am not surprised to learn that T. Ray used to genuinely love Deborah. Probably because I know how a man feels when he sincerely loves a woman- the feeling remains eternal. And as I was reading, I hold in my heart the hope that T. Ray really did, even for once.
Deborah’s leaving crashed T. Ray entirely. He lost a man of dreams, a gentle and loving father, a kind neighbour, and a faithful son of God. Deborah’s parting justifies T. Ray’s change of persona; however, his actions remain unjustified.
2. Had you ever heard of ‘kneeling on grits’? What qualities did Lily have that allowed her to survive, endure, and eventually thrive despite T. Ray?
One of the old-fashioned corporal punishments practiced in the Philippines is by kneeling, not on grits, but on rock salt or monggo. Sometimes with things lifted in both hands, or with swatting or slapping involved. Luckily, I have not experienced such.
Meanwhile, Lily is a will-powered teenager. Despite her youth, she is molded by strength, conviction, dignity, and love. She uses these to escape from brutality and injustice, and later on finds belongingness and family.
3. Who is the queen bee in this story?
The queen bee, as described in the novel, is the source of oneness of an entire colony. She is strictly guarded and lives a luxurious life. Once gone, the entire colony gravely suffers and dies. Suffice to say that she is the center of another universe we do not live in. If I may, the queen bees in the story are the Black Madonna and August Boatwright.
The Black Madonna (or Black Mama Mary) represents the inner strength that everybody possesses. We feel her mostly during solitude and trying times. One finds peace from feeling and trusting that she is enough because she is loved. She is protected by the mother of Jesus Christ. She is treated like her daughter.
Meanwhile, August Boatwright, being the eldest of the Calendar sisters, seems to be the perfect older sister that everyone wishes to have. She is a mother, father, brother, sister, priest, doctor, leader, cook, and adviser- combined. She knows your deepest concerns even when not telling them, and she manifests composure during the hardest times in the women’s lives.
4. Lily’s relationship to her dead mother was complex, ranging from guilt to idealization, to hatred, to acceptance. What happens to a daughter when she discovers her mother once abandoned her? Is Lily right- generally, would people rather die than forgive? Was it harder for Lily to forgive her mother or herself?
Lily’s relationship to her dead mother becomes complex when she starts to (1) remain guilty for accidentally killing her, and (2) create an impression of a perfect Deborah. She boxes herself in a fairytale story because she is escaping a harsh reality. And truly, no one can blame such fourteen year-old.
On another note, I believe that arrogant people would really rather die than forgive. But to those who have changed over time, it is easier to forgive than to be doomed in hatred. With commendable help from Rosaleen, Boatwright sisters, and the Daughters of Mary, Lily eventually forgives herself and her mother and realizes that her life is precious, and so does she.
5. Lily grew up without her mother, but in the end she finds a house full of them. Have you ever had a mother figure in your life who wasn’t your true mother? Have you ever had to leave home to find home?
Aside from my mother, no one has affected and changed me notably. Though I dearly remember special women who have imparted wisdom, I still do not consider them immediately next to my mother.
Leaving home to find another home is a sad chapter in anyone’s life. I find home to be the safest among the places I have been to. Of course, there are times when I wish I am with friends and caring groups, but home spells family. And family spells love. Love, then, spells life.
6. What compelled Rosaleen to spit on the three men’s shoes? What does it take for a person to stand up with conviction against brutalizing injustice? What did you like best about Rosaleen?
Dignity and self-righteousness is what compels Rosaleen to spit on those racists. It takes faith in man and in God to rival social injustices. I admire brave Rosaleen for standing up and fighting for her freshly- enacted right amidst a racist American society. My favorite Rosaleen trait is obviously her dignity. The ‘I ain’t saying sorry to them bastards’ attitude is highly commendable.
7. Have you ever heard of the Black Madonna? What do you think of the story surrounding the Black Madonna in the novel? How would the story be different if it had been a picture of a White Virgin Mary? Do you know women whose lives have been deepened or enriched by a connection to an empowering Divine Mother?
Before this novel, I have not heard of the Black Madonna. The story of the Black Madonna (Madonna of Chains) in the novel is an instrument to gauge the roots of faith of the Daughters of Mary. I honestly could not think of it being white. And lastly, I do not know a women’s group whose lives have been deepened or enriched by a connection to an empowering Divine Mother. I only know a congregation called Sisters of Mary, whose advocacy is educating the poor and providing them livelihood. In fact, they are one of our partners in our scholarship program.
8. Why is it important that women come together? What did you think of the Calendar Sisters and the Daughters of Mary? How did being in the company of this circle of females transform Lily?
First of all, I am a guy, therefore I could only speak what I think is appropriate. Over the years, women have successfully battled their rights and causes, and have been heard. This is one proven result of oneness of the women. Worldwide, there are notable women leaders in politics and pioneers in education, science, peace, health, and church.
Going back, the Calendar Sisters provides Lily a family while the Daughters of Mary gives her a community. In all, she can now claim an identity. Being in such companies, Lily realizes the importance of forgiveness, inner strength, love, and a call for maturity.
9. May built a wailing wall to help her come to terms with the pain she felt. Even though we don’t have May’s condition, do we also need rituals, like wailing walls, to help us deal with grief and suffering?
In Jewish practice, a wailing wall is located in Jerusalem to serve as direct channel to God. Tourists gather and pray or mourn, whichever they find fitting. They insert papers in the crevices containing their prayers and intentions. I think that May is clever to create her own wailing wall. It helps her all the time.
There is nothing wrong with rituals or practices that help us cope with the harshness of reality. But more than that, I think we should never lose faith and never cease to pray. On another note, whenever I feel like prayers are not enough, I write in my diary, talk to a trusted friend, and blog through my social networks.
10. How would you describe Lily and Zach’s relationship? What drew the together? Did you root for them to be together?
Lily and Zach’s admiration for each other is fairly normal. Given that they routinely see each other in one setting makes it easier for them to grow closer and be sweeter. I honestly do not care whether they end up or not. Zach has dreams to pursue and so does Lily. The novel says they will part ways but in the meantime, I hope they get to achieve their dreams first.
11. Project into the future. Does Lily ever see her father again? Does she become a beekeeper? A writer? What happens to Rosaleen? What happens to Lily and Zach? Who would Zach be today?
Every reader wants a happy ending, including me. Hence, given the chance to project the characters destiny, the following would be my preferences:
Lily sees T. Ray again, but this time, T. Ray is a changed man. Either he serves in a church or he is a successful businessman (exporter of peaches). If not, Lily sees T. Ray after she gets married and is a mother now, but this time; T. Ray is bedridden and is soon to die.
I am certain that Lily will be a beekeeper. She spends her adolescence and womanhood with the Boatwright Sisters and be a honey bee entrepreneur too. She could also become a writer if she would be able to translate her childhood into a beautiful story. Or she could write about a common girl becoming an ‘it’ girl in their school, and how it is not important to be one.
I hope Rosaleen finds her man. It would be nice for her to start a family and raise her children well. Lily and Zach, as I said before, would accomplish their dreams first, and then they see each other after a long time, and go into relationship. Lastly, I wish Zach would be a case-winning, ass- kicking lawyer.
The Secret Life of Bees is a treasure revealed. It teaches readers to believe in the divine power of love. It confirms the inevitable value of maternal love. It welcomes everyone who has personal issues to the pink house, in the hope that one day; they could get out of it as a changed person. You need not to cry while reading it. It is enough for you to realize that while you can, taste the sweetness of life and hum with your loved ones.
Segue: if you are into paternal love, try reading The Road byCormac McCarthy, a story of a father and son amidst a post-apocalyptic America. Painful, tiring, and emotionally-awakening. Also try reading The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night Time by Mark Haddon (the story is not really paternal love), I just wish to introduce you to Christopher’s father, Ed.
No comments:
Post a Comment